An Exercise in Self-Love

Instructions for "An Exercise in Self-Love":

• When you notice yourself giving yourself a hard time in your mind, stop.
• Notice the quality of the thoughts in your head and label them, are they critical? Mean? Anxious? Depressive?
• Take a couple of belly breaths to move out of a reactive state into a calmer state.
• Now think of someone you love very much. (It can be a pet too!)
• Focus on the feeling of love that arises as you focus on that person and let it grow as big as you can get it.
• From this feeling of love, say to yourself: "I love you, and everything is just fine."
• Feel what this feels like in your body, and try to carry this feeling with you as you move on with your day.

We are our own harshest critics, and we get away with it because other people can't hear our thoughts and intervene when we are being mean to ourselves. Can you imagine if you heard your best friend speak to themselves as you speak to yourself sometimes? You would step in immediately to reassure them and offer loving words, so here's an opportunity to do that for yourself.
​It might feel weird in the beginning, but why should it? We all deserve love, even when we have messed up, in fact, isn't that when we need love the most? 
(Don't rush over the step of making the feeling of love really big, you want to come from a genuine feeling of love when you talk to yourself, it will give your words a real depth.)

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"Well-ordered self-love is right and natural." - Thomas Aquinas

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