I heard someone say once that if we were to write anxiety like an equation it would be "an overestimation of the problem, over an underestimation of our strength to deal with the problem".
Something I often ask clients to do is to take an inventory of the strengths and resources they have, things such as perseverance (aka stubbornness), friendships, compassion, creativity, a meditation practice, work ethic, communication skills, a loving and loyal pet, you get the idea.
These are the things that we can call on to help us through difficulty, and as we head into another year of uncertainty, now is a good time to take stock of what we have to see us through.

If you find your list is looking a little short, ask a friend or someone you look up to to help you (you can do this in your imagination if you like), what would they list your strengths and resources as?
When you have your list, keep it handy, read it often, and always remember, you're stronger than you think.

We are in the space between Christmas and New Year, and for those of us lucky enough to be off work, it can sometimes be a challenge to completely switch off when we've been busy. The body and mind get used to going at a certain pace, and remembering to intentionally relax can help us to get the rest we need to face the new year refreshed.
Check in with yourself a few times each day this week to see what your inner state is, are you needlessly rushing? Are you holding tension? Are you thinking about things you have to do?
Whatever you notice, give yourself permission to let it go. Slow down, relax the muscles, park the item onto a to-do list and forget it. 
Think of these little acts of switching off as money in the energy bank for the coming year.

This Christmas may be unusual for many of us as so many people won't get home to see our loved ones. No doubt this will bring some sadness, but it is possible to still have a Merry Christmas, if we take care with our thoughts.
Thoughts really matter. If we approach the holidays focusing on what we lack, we will feel that lack whatever we are doing. If we approach them with a sense of gratitude, we can have a merry and full holiday, whatever our circumstances.
See if you can bring your awareness to the mental attitude you bring to the coming weeks, and if you notice an attitude of lack, see if you can shift toward gratitude. Don't underestimate the power of a little gratitude, studies have shown that a regular gratitude practice can rewire the brain to be more positive.
When we have breath in our lungs there is something to be grateful for, so bring your attention to the small things, they really do matter.

Wishing you a Joyful Christmas, whatever you're up to.

There has been a change in pace in the past weeks, with the easing of Lockdown restrictions and Christmas shopping and socialising back on the menu, and for some, this has brought an increase in anxiety levels as we struggle to adjust and keep up.

This week, give yourself the gift of a little self-care by making some time to do one of your favourite practices. It might be a little yoga (Yoga with Adriene is my go-to), a guided meditation (Tara Brach has some nice offerings), or take a 20 minute walk by the sea or in the forest. 
When life is busy, we may feel more squeezed for time, but making space to calm the mind saves us time in the long run, so consider it an investment.

We've all heard the saying "Don't meet trouble half-way", but how do we put it into action?

This week, set a timer on your phone to go off at random times during the day. 
When you hear the timer, check in with your thoughts. Are you thinking of what might go wrong? Or worrying about how you're going to deal with a problem? 
If the answer is yes, ask yourself "Is there anything I can do about this right now?" If not, then let the thought go, it's just stressing you in the present. 

Back in Lockdown, many of us are spending more time in our own heads as the things that usually distracted us from ourselves have been removed. 
An important thing to remember right now is that Thoughts are NOT Facts. Not everything you think is true, and so it is helpful to develop a practice of questioning your thoughts, instead of taking them at their word.
Left alone to wander, the mind will tend toward negative thinking. This is just how we are built, it's something that has helped us evolve and stay alive over the centuries - the mind scans the environment for potential danger so we can prepare for it. A certain amount of this thinking is obviously helpful, but too much can paint a dire picture.
Add to this the tendency for our mood to colour our thinking, and a mild sadness can spiral into a depression without us even noticing.

Make it a practice to bring your awareness to what is happening inside your mind, and question it. Here are some questions I find helpful:

• Is this thought ALWAYS true? Or is it tied to what is happening right now, or my current mood?
• How does this thought make me feel? 
• If my good friend was having this thought, what would I say to him/her?
• If I asked a good friend for feedback on this thought, what would he/she say to me?
• What story does this thought tell about me? And is that story necessarily true? (Try to be objective in your answer)
• If I were to fast-forward a few weeks or months, would this thought still be true?

Sometimes our minds are like a broken record, we mull over the same thoughts, memories, or problems without reaching any clarity or resolution. We can even feel more confused after wandering through the maze of our own minds endlessly.
When this happens, it can help to ask for help, and we can do this internally.

If you find yourself this week struggling with an anxious thought, a dilemma, a dark mood, pause and take a breath.
Connect to the present moment by tuning in to your senses.
Think of a person you trust or admire, they can be someone in your life like a parent or teacher (living or dead), it may be a public figure, or a spiritual leader. 
Then ask yourself: "What would (insert name of your chosen wise person) do right now?/say to me right now?"
Listen for the answer - it may come right away, it may come later, be patient.

Take one minute three times each day to put your worries, thoughts, troubles on a shelf, and just be in this moment. 
Breathe deeply and allow the muscles in the shoulders, face, and stomach to relax. Don't worry, anything important will be there when you come back, but for now, rest in the moment.
The more we can allow ourselves to follow this prescription, the more peace we create in our lives.

"Go as far as you can see,
Then see how far you can go."
- My Dad's Friend

I have this quote on the wall in my office to remind myself and my clients that while goals are very useful things, sometimes they can become overwhelming, or a stick to beat ourselves with. A goal can loom over us and discourage us by it's very size, or it may seem so far off that we are disheartened by the length of the journey ahead.

It's important to remember that we reach any destination step by step, day by day, breath by breath.
If you're looking to make a change in your life, or if there's a goal you want to reach, have a picture of where you want to eventually end up for sure, but then break it down into bitesize pieces that you can celebrate as you go.
For example, if you want to drop a stone, you might want to break that down into 2 pounds a week and acknowledge that win each week. The encouragement and sense of achievement you feel will keep you motivated to proceed.
​If you're working on letting go of depression or anxiety, then acknowledge the 5 or 10 minutes of calm or light-heartedness you felt today, they really do count. Keep working, with compassion and care, and those 5 or 10 minutes will be come 15 or 20, 25, or 30, and some day, a reversal will happen, and there'll be more joy and calm than dark and worry.
Have faith and be steady on your course, as long as you are moving in the right direction, you will get there.

It's in our nature to attempt to foresee difficulties in life so we can prepare ourselves for them. This skill has helped us stay alive back in the days when we lived in a hunter-gatherer society, when danger was always around the corner. It has helped us develop safer and more comfortable ways to live in, and get around our world. This skill helps us live our own lives with more ease and fewer nasty surprises. 

However, some of us overdo this. We look into the future and see only darkness and hardship, we may tell ourselves that we are only trying to be prepared, or not leave ourselves open to disappointment, but what we are really doing is allowing the future that may not happen ruin the present. This can leave us stressed, tired, and depressed.

This week, see if you can catch yourself worrying about the future, or thinking of the bad that may happen. 
Remember that you are not a fortune teller, and you cannot know the future.
See if you can notice three good things in your life right now, in this moment. (No matter how big or small)
Remember that each time we actively look for the good in life, we are training our brain to be more naturally aware of the positive. You never know, you might find that life is better than you think.